As my mom has always said “It’s more important to be proactive than reactive”, and this post is most definitely reactive. After the following exchange on her own blog, (and reupping on “herbal supplements” *cough*) I realize I took my anger at all body shamers out on Ms Kang because she made an easy target as a public figure. I stand by my convictions that body shaming, concern trolling, bullying, and offering unsolicited weight loss advice is NEVER okay, and I’ll always call it out when I see it happening, however, in the future, I’ll try to start by being peaceful instead of taking cheap shots.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ll never try to lose weight, I’ll never worry about so-called “problem areas” (My only “problem area” is my bum pancreas and bipolar reproductive system) and I’ll never work out because I fucking don’t want to, but in the future, I’ll try to focus on the intended purpose of this blog; rants and recipes đ And starting this year, I’m hoping to branch out into more lifestyle subjects like crafts and upcycling projects as well as progress on building my tiny house.
I’m deleting the mean memes as it’s wrong of me to use her children as props in expressing my angst, (For that, I apologize, and I’m replacing them with kittens). That being said, the douchewaffle who inspired this post is still very much being killed off in my novel. He has a history of bullying and continues to harass a dear friend of mine, and those who know me know if you fuck with my friends, you fuck with me.
We all have that friend on Facebook, the recovering addict who replaced drug use with working out and fills your news-feed with this crap:
“It’s 9 am and I’ve already got my workout in and now I’m fixing a beef and kale protein shake. #feelingtheBURRRRRRNNN”
“Leg day was a BEAST!!! Feels like my legs are spaghetti noodles! #nopainnogain”
“Loves a woman who does squats #datass”
“Paleo is the way to go! #proteinpower”
‘Bread is for losers! #lowcarb4life”
“Making noodles from chicken breast strips because carbs are for dorks and fuck PETA! #vegetariansarefatlosers”
“The only high I need is the high that comes from running #fitnessismydrug”
Jesus tap dancing Christ! I liked this guy better when he was coked out of mind, but whatever, those types of posts I can ignore. I don’t expect everyone to have the same interests as me and I’m sure plenty of folks roll their eyes at my pet photos, though I must say, looking at hundreds of cat photos is a small price to pay for my witty social commentary:)
Then he started posting shit like this:
How about we respect everyone until we’re given a reason not to?
Fuck you, Big Daddy, this douchetard thinks I’m fat, so find your own ride to the cardiologist. I have to exercise or some high school dropout who installs windshield wipers for a living won’t want to fuck me!
Hold the fuck up, burgers, fries, and sodas are bad for me?! Â Whaaaaat?! I had no idea!
I’ve discussed the fallacies of this meme before, but seriously, why do fit people assume fat people are stupid? This is not only condescending, and grossly overgeneralized, it does absolutely nothing to help this “obesity epidemic” they keep crying about. If you’re a fitness enthusiast, and your goal is honestly to promote a healthy lifestyle, then the images depicted after the equal sign should be numbers; blood glucose, cholesterol, potassium, not spray-tanned barbie and ken dolls.
And then there’s my personal favorite:
First of all, I don’t owe you, or anyone else an “excuse” for the way I look. Second, when  you are called out for fat shaming, the adult response is to offer a REAL apology, admit to fucking up, and re-post the photo with a different caption, NOT issue this bullshit “apology” placing the blame on those offended:
“I’m sorry you took an image and resonated with it in such a negative way. I won’t go into details that I struggled with my genetics, had an eating disorder, work full time owning two businesses, have no nanny, am not naturally skinny and do not work as a personal trainer. What I WILL say is this. What you interpret is not MY fault. It’s yours. The first step in owning your life, your body and your destiny is to OWN the thoughts that come out of your own head. I didn’t create them. You created them. So if you want to continue âhatingâ this image, get used to hating many other things for the rest of your life.You can either blame, complain or obtain a new level of thought by challenging the negative words that come out of your own brain.
With that said, obesity and those who struggle with health-related diseases is literally a ‘bigger’ issue than this photo. Maybe it’s time we stop tip-toeing around people’s feelings and get to the point. So What’s Your Excuse?â
Don’t you just love how she says we need to “quit tiptoeing around people’s feelings”, yet she can’t seem to handle the few bits of constructive criticism she has received out of the THOUSANDS of fan mail? Seriously, go look at her Facebook page, she’s throwing herself a big ol’ pity party because it bothers her that some of us have the “audacity” to stick up for ourselves and how dare we feel “entitled” to be fat?! Yeah, she said that. But don’t bother writing on her wall, she doesn’t have the pussy juice to post anything that’s not praise.
In case you didn’t notice, I don’t tolerate shit like this, so I wrote the following open letter to Mrs Kang on my Facebook:
An open letter to Maria Kang:
Dear Mrs Kang,
Get over yourself. It’s okay to be proud of your accomplishments, it’s not okay to shame other women for having different priorities than you. Speaking as a former gym rat who also is genetically predisposed to being fat, I know for a fact that you don’t get a body like that working out for only an hour a day. Take some ownership, you look the way you do because you sacrifice time with your children for time at the gym. No one owes you an “excuse” for not working out, but you will one day owe your children an excuse for not being there for them. The adult thing to do after being called out for your fat shaming statement (whether you meant it to be shaming or not), would have been to issue a REAL apology, acknowledge that you fucked up, and re-post the photo with a different phrase, instead you chose to deflect the blame onto those offended and continue a fat shaming tirade. THAT’S why you’re a bad person and a bad example for your children, not because I “chose to resonate hate” (that doesn’t even make sense, btw). Grow the fuck up.
Soon after posting that, I was called “anti-feminist”, accused of being jealous, and told that I could look like that too, if I would only get up off my ass.
I don’t know what exactly I have to be jealous of, I’m not tied down to a husband and three kids, my vag is still in one piece, and I’m not so filled with self-doubt that I have to resort to shaming others for their looks in order to feel better about myself.
And that is what’s wrong with this country. We live in a society in which not only is bullying acceptable, but when those of us being bullied stick up for ourselves, somehow the bully is the victim, and it’s assumed that women like me want to lose weight. It shouldn’t bother people that I don’t hate myself. It shouldn’t shock people when I describe myself as beautiful. Confidence is sexy, own that shit without tearing others down.
hummuscidalmaniac 
Trust me, I am ALL for people who are confident in their own bodies. Heck, do whatever you want. I am one of those people that post about my workouts because it keeps me accountable for myself. I have a quick question. So your allowed to post stupid pictures of your cats and your BIG fudge brownie at a restaurant but for some reason I am not allowed to put up posts about myself going to the gym? OKAY.. Second Maria Kang YES I will say what she put on the top of her picture wasnt the best idea to put up but at the same time I think its GOD awful that you sit there and say that her children “one day owe your children an excuse for not being there for them.” I have a child myself, pregnant again with my second. I ONLY WORKOUT WHEN HE TAKES NAPS and when I have my second I will probably do it when they are ASLEEP! So that doesnt take time away from my children whatsoever. So please dont sit there acting like she is a horrible mother to her children, dont put CHILDREN into the argument for ADULTS. I thought that was DOWNRIGHT rude and disrespectful of you to do was even say ONE thing about how she parents her children! Its not like if I knew you I would say how you feed your children pesticides and chemical SHIT that one day they will grow up thinking that, that kind of food is actually OKAY for their bodies. No I wont do that because unlike you I wont tell you how to parent. That is YOUR own thing on how YOU want to parent.
Have a blessed day đ
Post whatever you want, like I said, I don’t expect everyone to have the same interests as I do. I have plenty of friends who post constant gym updates and I’m rooting for them, it’s when they start talking shit about those who don’t workout for whatever reason that I get gangsta. As a vegan in Rural Va, there’s not a restaurant in a 200 mile radius that serves a brownie that I can eat, I only post photos of foods I cooked using my own recipes, because I’m proud of my kitchen skills, just like you’re proud of your gym skills. I chose to be child-free because I value my free time. Mrs. Kang states in her non-apology article on yahoo that she owns three businesses on top of working out for an hour a day, all I’m saying is that she’s not being entirely honest; she either has more help than she admits, or she sacrifices time with her children. I’m not a believer, but I appreciate the sentiment of “have a blessed day”, and I hope you do the same đ
I feel that its perfectly fine that you think that she is not being honest. We have all been dishonest at times in our lives but how she parents her children is totally up to her. Whether she was a stay at home mother, work out of the house mother NO MATTER WHAT she will get scrutinized for working out. Heck, Im a stay at home mother and I get the whole “Well you dont work for a living so you have no idea how it is” but then when I was working I got the whole “Well your not a stay at home mother having to clean and take care of kids all day long so you have no idea how it is”. So like I said us “fit” mothers get in trouble for being the way we are no matter what but the people who are eating unhealthy and sitting on the couch almost all day doing nothing except for watching their children is “normal”. Im sure Maria has help when she works her businesses but at the same time its really no one’s business what she does with her children and how she takes care of them. I know mothers that NEVER see their children because of other reasons im not going to say because its just not motherly but hey who am I to say they are a bad mother? Personally, I think Maria’s children will grow up great because they will realize that she works hard for what she has. She works hard at her 3 businesses and she worked hard to become healthy and stay healthy. Was my father a bad father for working all the time? Are military mothers and fathers bad parents because they have to deploy? No, my father and military people and just people in general parent in DIFFERENT ways. Are some people not very good parents, yes but thats not up to us thats up to CPS. And from what I can see her kids dont look like they need to be taken away from their mother and she doesnt look like a bad mother. I would appreciate people like you to not scrutinize mothers no matter what. Become one and then you can talk a little bit about it.
Children are already involved in this argument.
Fatshaming and fatphobia harm children, not just adults.
Your right fat shaming is NOT good and I would NEVER permit it but that does not mean its okay to talk about other people’s children. NO MATTER WHAT! Thats my bottom line and thats my point in this. I thought it was rude and disrespectful of a person to talk about how a person parents their children.
I agree that children shouldn’t be a part of the argument, which is why I didn’t say anything negative about her children. My (vegan) beef is with Mrs. Kang only, not her kids.
How did you not say anything negative about your children? “but you will one day owe your children an excuse for not being there for them.” Im pretty sure the words “children” are in there. So yes, you did talk about her children, thank you very much đ
That was a jab at Mrs Kang’s mothering skills, not her children. But unlike Mrs. Kang, I can learn from criticism, so I’ll admit that I can’t say with conclusiveness that she’s a bad mother, but I will say that I have more standing to make that conclusion than she does to presume to know why anyone is fat.
But why are you questioning Maria´s mothering skills? Do you know her personaly? How do you know she is a BAD mother? I do have 2 kids of my own, i BREASTFEED, i own a business and still have time to work out every night as they are sleeping, I spend all day long with them, but still makes time for my own health. Other thing, you say that you can learn from criticism unlike her… but, how can I make you change your mind about how being fat is NOT GOOD? That is my statement, I once was one but now I know that IN MY CASE is because I was a lazy ass woman who spend all day with my kids and hiding behind that “stay home mother” thing? No, I won´t make you change your mind, right? so why Maria or any other person would? If she thinks being fit is right for her, may God bless her, as if you think that being the way you are is right for you, may God bless you as well!!!! Is just that when you have a major change in your lifestyle, which leads you to feel awesome you want to share with people how is it like… Stop juding!
I’m not judging, I’m sticking up for myself. There’s a difference. Maria Kang chose to say something ignorant and when she was called out for it, refused to learn from the situation. I can’t say with certainty that she’s a bad mother, but I have more to base my assertion on than she does to presume to know why everyone whose appearance she doesn’t approve of look the way they do. I don’t give a flying fucksock if you think being fat is not good, do your aerobics and be sad, just don’t expect everyone to have the same priorities as you. Some people have nothing to offer the world but attractiveness so they choose to make others feel like shit and I ain’t fittin’ to have it.
See. you are the HATER, who can´t stand someones point of view. I do think being overweight is bad but I don´t judge people for wanting to be whatever they are. So you are telling me that because I work out Im sad? you are getting it sooooo wrong, do your research, working out actually makes you happier, i adore doing it, I DO have my childrien as a priority, but i know that I have to take good care of myself so I can stay longer and healty for my kids. I am very sorry that you asume that people who take care of their body are shallow and have nothing to offer but good look. As I said Im doing this for my family. My previous comment never intended to make others feel like shit and I believe Maria´s didn´t want to make others feel that way neither. Overall I think that our body is our only vehicle throgh this life and we need to take good care of it.
Well you felt the need to tell me I’m “bad” for being fat; people who feel good about themselves don’t feel the need to tear others down. Again, please re-read this post before commenting, I have nothing against fitness, just people who are assholes about it. I’m a vegan and I’m not even that sanctimonious.BTW, I love how your life is sooooooo “busy”, yet you have plenty of time to keep checking the comments.
i would also like to point out that in the barbie/ken shaming picture, the woman has no face! coincidence? probably not.
Ali, do you really honestly think that stay at home moms do nothing but sit on the couch and watch their children all day? I’m not even a mom and I know that’s not true! Some of them lead very hectic lives!
I am a SAHM and do work out, I find time to do it when my kids are sleeping, is good for your body, it gives you energy. I have two, one of them steel breastfeed, so it is possible…
No one said it wasn’t possible, but just because it’s important to you doesn’t give you the right to demand that every other mom out there make it a priority as well. Please re-read this entire post, you seem to have missed my point entirely. Bless your heart.
Oh my you are so full of it, nobody is DEMANDING ANYTHING, just keep inside your little bubble, I hope you have an awesome life and stop the hating you have within your heart
And I hope you learn how to form complete sentences. Bless your heart đ
Preach it sister! You are right on the money and funnier than hell!
Thanks đ
Thank you for this. Reading the comments is so frustrating. So many people just are NOT reading the whole post or are cherry picking and twisting what you’re trying to say. I have no problem with a mom that makes staying fit a priority. I think it’s possible for some people.. less practical for others. It completely depends on your situation and what you want out of life. After a long day of working or stay at home momming (also work) if you would rather collapse on the couch and watch some Netflix or read a book without pictures in it, that’s FINE! If what you do to unwind is go for a run and do some yoga, that is ALSO fine. If you have NO kids and don’t feel obligated to spend your free time at the gym, that too is absolutely fine! What Maria Kang did that was offensive (and put us fatties on the defensive) was suggest that anyone that has not achieved her level of fitness better have a good excuse. First of all, what kind of jerk puts themself on a pedestal like that? It’s one thing to feel good about your accomplishments. It’s another thing entirely to flaunt yourself expecting accolades then get mad when people call you out for your bulls–t. Her “apology” was yet another dick move. I’m not going to say she’s a bad mom because I have no idea, but her behavior and attitude is not a good example for her children. I also agree with you that she does not seem to be being entirely honest in her apology, considering she claims to not be naturally skinny, but also only works out 1 hour a day. I feel like either her body type is more natural to her than she claims or she is spending more time working on it than she claims. Any way you look at it, what she did was not kind and people are right to be upset.
Thank you for reading!And I agree with 1000%!Like I said, it’s a testament to how fucked up society is when it’s totally acceptable to bully somebody for their appearance, but when the bullied party defends themself, they’re the bad guy.
I just wanted to chime in that I’m a single mom with no nanny, and I don’t have a personal trainer or a gym membership, I work out for about an hour every day on average, at home, with my kid climbling all over me (read: I don’t sacrifice time with my kid to work out) and I look more or less like Maria Kang (from the neck down, lol). So, your assumption that you have to sacrifice time with your kids to look amazing(which is a side effect of being at your personal best in HEALTH) is erroneous. As in, false. As in, you are wrong, and now you owe HER an apology for accusing her of being a bad mother- Why do you personally believe it is impossible to be in top shape AND be a good mother? You have to look inside yourself to answer t hat question, just like the women who assume she has a nanny, assume she is paid to work out, assume she is genetically predisposed to being thin, etc, etc, etc. You are just another example of a woman using Maria Kang as a target for your projections.
Also, your “witticism” about how you liked certain people better when they were on cocaine, as opposed to a healthy habit, shows where you are coming from. It’s an ugly place.
Congratulations! You want a cookie? I have a few good recipes đ Please re-read this post before commenting again as you’ve missed my point entirely. Also, please stop reproducing, after all, birth control is free now, so you really have no “excuse” to breed ignorance. Bless your heart. đ
I agree with you that she may not be totally honest. She either has good genes or she must work out more than what she is saying. I have worked out for that amount of time and never gained an ounce of muscle. Just having 3 business can take away from her children. If she can work it out that she can have time with them then good for her she is making it work. But by fat shaming others and her so called apology is not being a good role model for her children. Some people just don’t have the genes to get the muscle tone that she has, some people are just going to have some fat on their bodies no matter how much they exercise. Basically she was being a bully more so by the so called apology that she gave. No one should be upset with you because you said something about her sacrificing time with her children. She put her kids in the picture and admitting to having 3 business would make someone wonder if she is sacrificing time with her kids so she put the kids in the middle of this to begin with.
Amen!
Lol.
Read the article sweets, maybe also worthwhile to read Kangs non-apology as well.
Because I’m sure you won’t do that, or if you already have, you may need someone to spell it out for you? Kang claims she is not genetically pre-disposed to a body like that, which implies she would need to work for it for much longer than an hour a day!
I’m also a single mum of a child with additional needs, struggled with an eating disorder, have studied as a personal trainer and am apparently genetically predisposed to be a little pudgy đ
Maria Kang, and all the other ‘milf warriors’ who run to her defence shit me to tears. I’ve got to problem with mothers wanting to be fit, but you know what? I do have an issue with people lying about how ‘easy’ it is, or sacrificing the needs of their children for the sake of their vanity. Maria Kang is doing one of the two.
I gave up my ‘looks’ so I could meet my child’s needs and study to give him a better future. That’s not anti-feminist, its actually calling out the bullshit patriarchal mentality that women must always remain a pretty little wallflower, and the women, like Kang who perpetuate it. I’ll have no part of that thank you very much. You may continue to delude yourself if you so desire, I’ve a strong feeling you will.
And dear Ali, I hope you also read this comment, because you need to.
Thank you hummuscidalmaniac for this post =) Please know that not all mothers are pretentious little fuckers.
*Testifyin’*
Also, I HATE when new moms say things like “I need to get my body back”, you didn’t lose your body, you became a mother!
Sorry It took me a while to comment back on this, but I do have a life. Anyways, my WHOLE entire family are obese, short, stubby women. They decide to sit on the couch before working out. Don’t get me wrong, do what you want to do and I wont put you down for that but I chose a different life for myself. I didnt want for my children to be a picky eater like I was when I was a child and only eating chicken nuggets from mcdonalds. I want my children to grow up eating right, knowing that food DOESNT have to run their lives. So just like Maria, I dont have genetics to be tiny my whole life, actually my genetics being latina is to get pregnant and stay big because thats how my whole family is but I wanted something different. Do I spend MORE than 1 hour a day on my working out? NO! I AM a personal trainer and in order to have a healthy lifestyle you only need to be working out for 150 minutes a week at moderate intensity, I do high intensity so I only need to do 75 minutes a week. So no, I dont spend more than 1 hour a day on working out and spending less time with my children. Like I said in my commenting before, no MATTER is Maria was a working mother, or a stay at home mother she would have been scrutinized EITHER WAY because thats the way people are. Trust me, its not easy having a body like Maria’s but you know what? You get off your butt and you run,walk, yoga, do something! If you dont want to and you like being 300+ lbs, HEY I DONT CARE! I really dont, thats your life but when you come to us fitness professionals asking us how to lose weight but you dont want to workout for more than 5 minutes than your really shit out of luck. My only problem throughout this whole thing was that the OP decided to say “âbut you will one day owe your children an excuse for not being there for them.â Which ultimately means to me that she is saying that Maria is not a good mother or has some horrible motherly skills. THAT is my problem with this posting. You don’t talk about another person’s motherly skills no matter how “offended” you feel by them. I am mad that Tom Cruise said that his job is like a soldier’s job in the field of Afghanistan. Does that mean I will go after his fatherly skills of his child? No! Thats my point,Thank you.
How about “It is 9 am and I’ve been at work for an hour, left the house 30 minutes before that. I was up at 5:30 to shower after going to bed at about 11 after cooking/cleaning/laundry/etc after making it home at about 7pm.”
Exactly! It’s unfair to assume that everybody’s situation is the same.
Not all fit people assume fat people are stupid.
If there’s a will there’s a way
Didn’t say they did, and for some people the only “way” is dangerous weight loss surgery. Some of us are just not meant to be skinny and that’s okay. What’s NOT okay is demanding an explanation from folks whose looks you don’t approve of. I don’t need permission to exist.
She was probably posting pictures and status updates as motivation for people. Some people like it, some people don’t. That’s what you get with Facebook. You won’t like everything that people post.
Being fit isn’t about looking a certain way. It’s about being healthy. I think that’s great that you’re comfortable in your own skin. That’s hard for a lot of women to feel. But there’s too many people who are unhealthy (over weight or not), and I think she’s just trying to help motivate and inspire people. If she attacked a specific person and told them they need to change I would say that’s not right. It’s people’s own choice to live how they want but I think it’s totally fine to post fitness and nutrition motivation. People need to be aware of their unhealthy lifestyles. Too many chronic diseases caused from bad health that can be prevented.
Motivation is fine. I try everyday to motivate people to go vegan, but I don’t demand an excuse from them for consuming animal products. I acknowledge that it’s hard, but worth it.
Yeah but millions of people have lived long, healthy lives as meat-eaters. And eating meat that’s prepared a certain way has health benefits that are backed by science.
Millions of lazy, over-weight, fat asses have not.
You can sit here and throw up smoke screens and make verbose, profane statements all you want. But the bottom line is, if you don’t exercise and eat right, you WILL suffer for it.
Yeah, I’m suffering sooooooo hard over here! The grand total of people who don’t find me attractive is up to TWO now! Once I stop crying, I’ll get right on that treadmill!
Maria,
This article is a little misguided. I think you’re missing the point of the “What’s your excuse?” statement.
None of us are demanding you give us an excuse. The question we are asking, is what’s the excuse you give to YOURSELF? To not take care of yourself?
You seem like you’re passionate about life. You encourage people to go Vegan. You obviously care about things. So why not care for yourself?
Exercise isn’t only about how you look. Sure, some people misrepresent exercise culture, and get caught up in the vanity of it all,but anything in the world has nutty extremists. Tune them out. Those who really love exercise and health, want you to get in shape because we need voices like yours to be heard for a long, long time.
Are you going to let some vein people with well-defined abs (completely genetic), thwart you from living the life you could be living?
I challenge you to re-think these statements and get out there and exercise your ass off. Not for us, but for YOU.
-Mike, certified personal trainer, gym owner, and people lover.
Because I’d rather die at forty having done whatever the fuck I wanted, whenever the fuck I wanted to than live to 100 having spent most of my “life” on a treadmill. It’s about quality over quantity for me. But I do appreciate your comments. You are a perfect example of how to be encouraging and motivating đ
To the people who keep yelling at her for calling out Kang:
Kang wasn’t being “inspirational.” She was being an a-hole. She wasn’t saying “what’s your excuse for not taking physical care of yourself?” She was saying “what’s your excuse for not living up to my/society’s standards of beauty?” She was saying that fitness is this magical formula, and that anyone who doesn’t look like she does is obviously just stupid/lazy. When somebody told her how her comments were coming off, she blew a gasket and claimed to be genetically predisposed towards being overweight, yet magically able to get that sort of body with only exercising an hour a day
[Newsflash: if it only takes you an hour a day to keep muscle tone and low-weight, you’re genetically predisposed towards being toned and light weight, not towards being overweight. Being genetically predisposed towards being overweight is when you can exercise four hours a day, eat like a bird, and still have your doctor insist you’re obese]
Also, you CANNOT measure someone’s health by how they look! Yet Kang’s insisting on that, which is something the author points out: if Kang’s focus was on health, she’d be posting numbers like blood pressure, not pictures of people looking “pretty” versus “ugly.”
For instance, me (since anecdotal evidence apparently outweighs scientific studies showing there’s very little link between BMI and health). My BMI is in the high thirties. I go on regular hikes, walk to clear my mind, exercise a minimum of an hour a day, as much as five. I don’t eat much, and when I do it’s vegetables, eggs, cheese, some pasta if I’m particularly hungry. I’m a college student, so affording salads and healthy foods is really, really hard, but vegetables are something important to me, so I try (and some people would rather live off of poptarts and pizza so they can afford gas for their car, and that’s fine too)
(I also /love/ all the implicit poor-shaming. In case people didn’t notice, some people have to work 80-hour minimum wage jobs and can’t afford anything other than McDonalds).
I actually have a ridiculous amount of muscle. It’s all covered in a layer of fat, though, so I’m not toned. I never eat fatty foods, but I look like I do
And you know what? At 230 pounds, fairly overweight, I’m healthy as a horse. I’m WAY healthier than my 100lb brother.
And I think her pointing out that it’s physically not possible to get that body despite being naturally overweight, have three jobs, and spend a ton of time with your kids. Maybe the father’s the primary care-giver, which is fine. Maybe she actually spends about two hours a day on each of those three jobs, which is also fine. Maybe she somehow magically doesn’t need sleep. But regardless, she’s lying about SOMETHING (how much effort it takes to look that way, how much she works, how much she spends time with her kids). And maybe she’s neglectful, or at least encouraging mothers who are already prone to caring more about their appearance than their kids despite supposedly being the primary caregiver (she’s most definitely doing the latter, or at least providing an excuse for those people. I know plenty of neglectful, verbally abusive mothers who like to reference people like Kang to support their neglect and harassment of non-perfect children, including my step-mom). The author doesn’t -really- know Kang’s situation, but she does know what Kang posts, and those things don’t add up.
I don’t agree with all the author’s points, either, and neither do I agree with Kang’s, or the author’s detractors. Yet you also don’t see me resorting to ad-hominen attacks, now do you? [Well, other than the a-hole comment. But, hey, I’m 18. I have an excuse for being immature and insulting back when someone insults me]
So I’ve got a question: what’s /your/ excuse for being a judgmental a-hole?
Amen! Thanks for reading đ
You claim that when you stick up for yourself to bullies that’s not okay, but where exactly do you “stick up for yourself”? All I see is an overweight, unhappy woman pointing out other women’s flaws. My best friend from high school worked her ass off to get back into shape after her SECOND child and I applaud her commitment to her health. Her children have an excellent role model in a mother who values taking care of herself and hard work over making excuses. You wouldn’t criticize a mother who works or goes to school, yet you have no problem shaming a mother who goes to the gym. Maybe that’s the problem- you don’t hold physical fitness in the same esteem that you would a career or an education.
You have no children, you live in a rural part of the US without brownie “in 200 miles” (or so you claim), so……what IS your excuse?
OMG, for the last time, READ MY FUCKING POST BEFORE COMMENTING! You’ve missed my point entirely, not that I expect much intelligence from fat-shaming fucksticks such as yourself, but DAMN! What’s your excuse for being an ignorant, miserable, insufferable, twatwaffle?
I like how everyone is cherry picking…
Omg!! You used the word “and”!!! Fuck you lady.
=D
Kang wants to know my excuse?
Not that it’s any of her fucking business… BUT I happen to suffer with rheumatoid arthritis and am very restricted in the types, intensities, and frequencies of exercise that I can engage in. I eat a well-balanced diet that is regularly enriched with chocolate because life is too short to deny myself the enjoyment that comes from a piece of delish milk chocolate melting in my mouth. I love my curves, and I have NO interest in going to a sweaty-ass, fluorescently-lit gym at 5am in the morning (or any time of day). I do enjoy lots of walking outdoors though – there’s more to look at then sweaty gym people/television. I also love reading and a lot of time is spent curled up in my arm chair devouring books with a cup of joe.. and of course some chocolate biscuits.
I’m genetically predisposed to being thin along with the rest of my family, but I’m not. (By the way, my super fit and thin sister happens to smoke cigarettes and only eats vegetables if they are covered in cheese. Just sayin.)
I’m also a respected healthcare professional, and I LOVE my job. I have seen firsthand that health can be achieved at any size, and the belief that fat people are lazy and a strain on the healthcare system is as bigoted as saying that gingers are a strain on the healthcare system (because they are at higher risk for UV-related carcinomas).
So Kang, darling, my excuse is that I love my body and my life and I feel no need to change it. Now you know.
*testifyin’*
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this is a really long argument, I didn’t finish all of the comments…but I can spend 2hrs a day in the gym, eat clean, mostly vegan, mostly raw [low carb] And still be heavy. Not everyone is programmed to be “fit” and/or “thin” It is so true. I led a healthy pregnancy and ended up FAT as heck and I see extremely thin women get pregnant eat whatever they want and stay SUPER THIN and all baby. I was all on the “Maria kang bandwagon” agreeing with her until I started reading more and more of what she posts….She literally HATES fat or overweight people….She was super thin WAY before kids, I am guessing like me, she had to eat more calories to get pregnant and gained a few extra lbs before “finding out she was pregnant”….Say what you want but if you are 10lbs over weight she literally thinks you are disgusting, she still has an eating disorder and she hides behind it by acting like she is “fit.” Someone look up bulimia on google, overexercising and under eating into severe calorie deficit is still an eating disorder.
EXACTLY! It’s so heartwarming when someone gets the point. I’m a low carb vegan as well (I’m a type 1 diabetic, I don’t have much choice), I’m “allowed” 1400-1800 calories a day per my endocrinologist and even though I don’t exercise, my job has me on my feet all day and I have a very hyper pomeranian who requires long walks, in other words, some of us aren’t meant to be thin and that’s okay. I didn’t want to mention my diet habits because I don’t want to come across as shaming others or “justifying” my appearance, but it doesn’t matter to body shamers anyway, they don’t like the way I look and they have *all* the answers and they are entitled to tell me how to live my life. It amazes me how many people say things like I should be exercising instead of blogging. Oh, because you don’t approve of my looks, how *dare* I do something I enjoy?! I also love how Ms Kang whines about the drain on the healthcare system caused by obesity, yeah, I’m sure her THREE UNPLANNED, high risk pregnancies didn’t cost the system she cherishes so much a dime! What a cunt. Anywho, thanks for reading đ
I don’t think either of you are right. As a health care advocate I think if you have all these diseases you claim to have you should be eating not only vegan but possibly gluten free as well as working out at least 20-30 minutes a day 3-4 days a week. Although she went about it completely wrong that was what she was trying to say not to lose weight but to stay fit to stay healthy. I chose to workout an hour a day and eat healthy not to be skinny but because I feel better my hashimotos doesn’t flare up as much I even got pregnant which was something that was a very low chance. To say that women are tied down by children or a spouse is just a horrid thing to say I love my little family and I feel sorry for you that you think that is something to be ashamed of. If you are or were truly happy with your body you wouldn’t need a whole post dedicated to knocking down a woman who is also happy with her body and then bringing her children, husband, career and parenting skills in to your childish feud. Overall I think it was adolescent on both parties, but your use of language just made you look tacky while hers made her look like she was if anything classier than you. Good luck on your blog, may God bless you in all your endeavors.
As a health care advocate, you have no credentials whatsoever, nor did I hire you as my “advocate” so blow it out your ignorant ass you stupid fucking cunt. You should be fucking yourself at least 30-40 minutes a day, at least that way you won’t be able to bring more miserable children into your little bubble. If you were really happy with YOURSELF, you wouldn’t be here telling me how to live my life. You claim to love your family, but if you’re like this at home, I can assure you, st best, they pity you, but more than likely, they despise you because you’re an entitled, insufferable, twatwaffle. If you bothered reading (I know, I’m asking A LOT here) you’d see I never brought her family into the argument, just Ms Kang’s OWN WORDS on her PUBLIC page regarding her family. So because you’re too much of a pussy ass bitch to use “curse words” I’m “tacky”?! Have you even internetted before? Good luck on learning how to read, write, tie your shoes, pass third grade, be a decent mother, mind your own goddamned business and find a worthwhile hobby. May I suggest crochet?
The first time I saw her meme, I was offended. However, I then realized I was offended by myself for not making myself more of a priority and I have since started working out more and eating better. I actually like her apology letter better than the meme- and I agree that we need to really own our lives. I was a hell of a lot skinnier than her before I had my 5th baby- and I worked out maybe 5 hours a week while my kids were in school. It is certainly more difficult to find the time with a baby, but thinking “no excuses” has forced my lazy behind out of bed for exercise before getting the kids out to school- so what’s the harm? She’s just one person with one opinion- and, yeah, her personality sucks but the message to
make yourself a priority is a good one.
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